The boom and bust cycle, I’ve been there, I got the medal..
I definitely do not recommend it! Even so, it remains my achilles heel, so I’ve been thinking a bit about why that is.
Here’s what I’ve realised
There’s a reason that people with Fibromyalgia often push themselves too hard, too fast and then bust.
We know we have limited energy but we just want to get on with our lives – that’s only fair. It’s so frustrating to feel like you can’t achieve as much as you used to.
So when we have a good day we ‘make hay when the sun shines’ and then more hay and more hay – until our body decides ENOUGH IS ENOUGH!
Why do we do this?
One of the reasons is momentum. Once we start a task it’s hard to not stop before we’re finished and the task can grow as we see more things that need to be done. Or if it’s something we love doing, we naturally don’t want to stop!
It’s called momentum because we get caught up what we’re doing and are driven from one moment to the next to keep going.
Bargaining with ourselves
‘Just half an hour more’, ‘just one more phone call’, ‘I’ll just walk another block. it’s such a lovely day’!
When the inevitable crash comes you beat yourself up and tell yourself you’ll try harder. You BLAME yourself and your body for failing you.
Doing any or all of these things does not make you a failure
It just means you’re human and you care about living a full life.
But it also means you’re not getting the best out of your body, and you’re teaching it to push on when it’s crying out to stop – your capacity levels become lower & the crashes are harder.
Capability VS Capacity
I’ve talked about capability vs capacity here – it’s worth reminding yourself that you ARE a capable person, and by learning what your limits are on any given day, you’ve given yourself choices.
Here’s what you can do about it
Once I realised something needed to change I asked myself these big questions. Answering honestly has been a game changer:
What is Boom and Busting STOPPING me from doing – what’s it COSTING me in terms of living my life the way I want? (Physically, emotionally, socially)
How much TIME am I needing to recover when I could be doing something else that I care about? You may need to make a note of how often you’re flaring or unable to do what you need to/want to because of the effects of doing to much to answer this question
What brings me JOY? Whether it’s playing with the kids/grandkids, going for coffee with friends, doing the gardening or something else completely – what do YOU like/want to do most of your life?
How is Booming and Busting impacting on doing those things you want to do most?
Next Step – PACING!
In my next post I’ll talk more about pacing, what it is & how it works best.
Please remember that people without Fibromyalgia also want to do all the things and no one person can! We all have limitations, and it’s good to remember that, to cut yourself some slack.
You are doing your best – never forget that!